Express your feeling
Have been living for 24 years
What have you learnt?
Do you enjoy your life
Let’s celebrate this moment
Take time to pray for a better future
And let me say
Happy birthday for all people
Who celebrate the same birthday with me
Wish you will always be health and happy 😄😄❤️
Overwhelming by
Irresponsible people
Who put their weight on you
Tired by
Powerlessness on their display
Force you to take their responsiblity
Try to ignore it?
It only leave you feeling guilty
At the end of the day
Just before I fall asleep
Often I wonder
When will my life begin
I don’t know it before
That boredom can kill you
It hits your core
The soul
Sucking your energy
Leave you feel restless
Don’t know where this all will be going
It seems so far away, the happy ending
No goal, no purpose
Wasting time, lost of direction
No love, no rose
Not a kid, no need a caution
Frustation in the head
Unexplained a sense of sadness
Escaping from the world
Escaping from the self
Plan of escape
Change the name, change the hair color
Be someone new
Sit alone on the the empty chair
It’s night, ready to get work, about to night shift again
Listening to long live song
Texting old friend
Ask for some ideas to light up the day
But it’s just still empty
Sensing the lost of direction
Where I stand now, where I want to go
I just feel dull, right now
Want to play another role
Do you feel happy?
It’s a simple question yet hard to answer
It’s a crucial question but easily forgotten
You don’t fight hard enough to win
You put yourself last after everyone
Then you wonder, why unhappy things happened?
In between the tears you wonder why you let it happened
Why stay with someone who undervalue you
Why stay in environment that disgraded you
Why stay when you feel unappreciated
Use your compass, ask your self
Do you feel happy?
Have you been happy today?
Because that’s what matter
Only you know how it feels to be you
Don’t hope someone will understand
Because they’re busy living their own life too
Grow up, stand up for your ownself
Don’t ask someone to speak up for you
When you feel like lost, just ask inside
Do you feel happy?
There’s something about me
that you just can’t understand
I don’t expect you to
It was just still too heartbreaking
To accept the fact of what had happened
of what you did when I gave my all
But I ain’t gonna deny it
Not gonna re-live the pain
Let what have been in the past stay that way
But why sometimes it’s haunting me again
It seems I still can’t deal with it
Feeling and memories mixed inside
Turn on the turmoil of your last presence
I never hear any explanations
No sincere words of forgiveness like you did before
Not even a goodbye
You just disappeared like I never did appear in your life
I try to ignore the inside question asking why
Because I just can’t explain the reason
There was no explanation
It was like you slammed the door in my face
When I stood there right in front of your place
And I desperately banged my head off the door
Wish you will open it but you just disappeared
Why it had to be so sadden
Why I let myself fall for someone as cruel as you
Set me free from all this suffering
Break me free from all this burden
Stop torturing me
By the way, I still miss you
It’s been a long time, isn’t it?
How can I put it in to the words
I don’t even dare to ask how you are
You cut it so badly, dear
I have nothing to say
If you can only see
All the door are opened
If only you come
I will welcome you
It’s impossible for you
not to see
all the doors are opened
But you just don’t
want to come, do you?
I know, no problem
I’m waiting here
not expecting you to come
just want to see
Who will really care at the end
I found the old journals I wrote 3 years ago
I read it all again and was struck by the words
So lively, so energizing
Full of plans and hope
So alive, it made me wonder
What had happened to me
Now I often feel so low, full of doubt
Those writing kind of reminding me
I can be whatever I want to be
Can’t I have a real friend?
At least for once
Want to have someone to talk to
Why I have to?
Lost and hope
I am nowhere
Lucky me
My sanity still keeps it safe
But sometimes
I just want to shut down
